I feel like a person’s taste in Rule 34 Porno is often a good indicator of their age. Dirty movies based on Naruto started blowing up a few years back as the early viewers reached a certain horny age, and I’m old enough to remember when the same thing happened with Dragon Ball. Personally, I’ve always had a thing for Chun Li, though there have been enough iterations of Street Fighter over the years that you’ll never guess what year I was born. Other trends happen much faster, like when Resident Evil Village came out and the web was flooded with Lady Dimitrescu hentai.
So, who’s your favorite famous character to see in a NSFW setting? Chances are, you’ll find her today at Rule34Porno.com, a free hentai tube with a focus on X-rated parodies. The site has gone from zero to 80,000 visitors a month in the short time since they launched, and after having a look around, I’m pretty fucking sure I understand why! If you’re curious what got me all hot and bothered today, read on and I’ll spell it out for you. Otherwise, just click the link to see your favorite superheroines and anime babes getting boned.
There Are No Exceptions to the Rule
At this point, I feel like almost everyone has heard of the titular Rule 34, which ain’t at all limited to the Rule34Porno website. Wikipedia traces the roots of the meme to a webcomic penned way back in 2003, in which a character is shocked to see a pornographic parody of Calvin and Hobbes. The rule states thusly: “There is porno of it. No exceptions.” Even if you’ve never heard the rule itself, you’ve almost certainly seen examples.
If not, buckle in and get ready for a hell of a ride. As you’ve probably already guessed from the setup here, Rule34Porno offers sexy variations on a wide range of characters from comic books, anime, video games, movies, cartoons and more. The very moment I landed, I saw Black Cat sucking dick, Poison Ivy getting nailed from behind, Squirrel Girl in a sauna, Psylocke taking it up the butt, and Emma Frost taking Spidey’s big ol’ hog. That’s all on the front page as I type this up.
I do wish they had a page of characters or fictional universes to explore. You can type whatever you’re looking for into the search bar, and I was able to find anything I tried, from Sailor Moon to Avengers to Mulan, but sometimes it’s just nice to see a list. There’s a link out front to a Categories page, but I got a 404 Not Found error when I tried clicking it. Rule34Porno.com is still a new site, though, so hopefully it’s in the works.
There is a Stars page, though it wasn’t at all what I expected. On any other tube, you’d expect a picture menu of pornstars, amateurs and rising starlets. Given the theme here, I was hoping this might be the Characters index I was hoping for, but it looks like they’re currently using it to keep track of either uploaders or video creators. Most of the “Models” only had one movie each.
Are You Kinky or What?
Another reason I’m hoping for a well-maintained Categories page in the future is just the sheer scope of the depravity within. As a hentai site,
Rule 34 Porno has a greater, deeper range of perversion than your typical free porn tube. The folks creating these videos don’t have the same budget constraints as live action pornographers. As much as I’d love to do some futanari inflation tentacle gangbangs over at PornDudeCasting, I just don’t have the resources.
So, what is it that gets your motor going? Is it typical porno stuff like blowjobs, lesbians, butt sex and cowgirl rides, or are you into freakier fetishes? They’ve got regular human kinks like footjobs and BDSM, plus otherworldly delights like monster girls, furry sex, slime, internal view cumshots and an absolute abundance of futanari content. I always thought the term translated to “dick girl” in English, but it’s actually “to be of two kinds”. Still, futa fans know to expect pretty girls with big eyes, big boobs, and big cocks.
Even though there’s currently no full, browsable index of categories, the content of Rule34Porno.com is tagged very well. That means the search bar is your friend, and you can also tap a keyword on any video to find similar content. I started on a thick Zelda cock-sucking video and clicked the Big Thighs tag, where I found my waifu Chun Li going interracial. From there, the Blacked tag led me to a clip of D.Va getting similar treatment, and then the Male POV button helped me find a first-person footjob by Abigail Marston of Red Dead fame.
It's worth mentioning that, despite the name, Rule 34 Porno ain’t strictly limited to hentai with the Rule 34 theme. Most of the videos feature a character from some typically SFW content doing explicit NSFW things, but other clips are just filthy, sexy fun. I found a nameless MILF getting her tits squeezed, a femdom foot domination scene with original characters, and a random chick taking a random cartoon dog dick, just to name a few non-parody scenes.
So Big, So Fast, So Hard
As a newer site, I was expecting Rule34Porno to have a fairly small collection. To my surprise, it took me a long fucking time to dig to the bottom of the stack. No shit, there are nearly 120,000 videos in the collection already. I have no idea how they’re sourcing this stuff, but holy shit, that’d be impressive even if the joint wasn’t just a few months old.
The funny thing is, I couldn’t find upload dates anywhere. It’s obvious they’re actively building the collection, though I can’t tell you exactly how many new clips are dropping on the daily. Some sites get a steady, non-stop trickle of fresh material, but nothing new showed up on the front page during my visit. I’m guessing there’s a moderation queue and they do massive batch uploads from time to time.
The very latest flick in the Rule 34 Porno catalog is a two-minute scene based on League of Legends. It’s a POV clip, making you feel like you’re getting a tit job and a blowjob at the same time from Miss Fortune while Katarina and Ashe play with their enormous boobies on either side of her. It’s a well-done piece of smut, complete with slurpy audio to match the onscreen antics, and I almost had to take a break from writing to do some fapping. There’s no Download button, but I was able to grab the 84 MB file using a third-party plugin for my browser, so go ahead and stock up if you’re a collector.
Since I loved the audio so much, I clicked the Sex Sounds tag to see what else I could find. When homemade 3D hentai first started getting big on the web, very few of the clips had any sound at all, but I’m happy to see that’s just not the case anymore. Today, I found page after page after page of Rule 34 Porno full of slippery, wet, squishy fuck noises and moaning that really helped ramp up the immersion. I should have brought my headphones to the coffee shop today, because man, I’ve been getting some weird looks all morning.
My biggest complaint about the site is that I did get a little bit of spam, though nothing that really slowed down my masturbatory process or got in the way. I just had to close a popup here and there when I clicked the Play buttons, though my adblocker seemed to adjust after a few videos and I stopped getting them. Don’t forget the digital condom, my friends.
Rule34Porno.com is a damn fine collection of short films that prove that age-old internet adage. Sure enough, there really is porn of anything you’ve already been fantasizing about, so why settle for shaking your dick at Netflix or other SFW content? Your favorite characters are all here, and they’re engaging in much, much filthier acts than you ever saw in the official versions. Don’t believe me? Have a look for yourself!
